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1. I am sixteen, suddenly.
I have grown up without anyone
telling me. My car keys rest heavily in
my palm. Each new college I hear about
rests heavily on my shoulders. I am
not sure how much longer I can take this,
all this extra weight of responsibilities, of choices,
of the future I’m not sure I want to have.
My skin feels stretched across my body
in places that don’t really make sense.
I still feel too big in every bad way—I’m
afraid I always will.

2. My first boyfriend tells me he
thinks I must have bits of the
universe inside of me. I try not
to get offended: I know he means to say
that kissing me is like kissing stars,
and that I hold the secrets of creation
inside my soul, but all I can think about
is how huge the universe is.

3. He breaks up with me at night.
For hours, I lean against my truck in
the driveway and look at the sky.
Stars are cold and distant,
I realize. The universe is big
and lonely.

4. Someone in my philosophy class tries to tell me
that I am tiny, that there’s seven billion
other people on the planet, that objectively,
no one would miss me if I were to disappear:
the hole I left would eventually be filled
by another faceless body.
I laugh, I think. This is the first time
in my life that someone has called me small.

5. I don’t want to be the universe,
or the stars, or the world. I
want to be myself, I want my skin
to fit right over my body, stretching
over lungs and muscles and veins.
and I want that to be enough.
i have just recently realized that i am a chubby girl who writes a lot of poems about a lot of different things but not one single poem about weight--so here you guys go. I whipped this up fairly quickly and so it might be horrible, for all i know it is, but i still wanted to post it. i would love to hear you guys' thoughts, comments, stories, what have you.
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Ripplingwaves Featured By Owner Apr 17, 2016
the beauty of this is how relatable people can find this
amazing! Heart 
demonicbutterflies Featured By Owner Nov 17, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
I can relate so much to this. I love the imagery :)
Pereyga Featured By Owner Sep 17, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
"I laugh, I think. This is the first time
in my life that someone has called me small."
Somehow those lines really got to me.
dragonfuture Featured By Owner Aug 9, 2014  Hobbyist Photographer
Gorgeous. :heart:
Sammur-amat Featured By Owner Aug 6, 2014   General Artist
i adore the whole thing, grae darling! :love:
AeronDust Featured By Owner Aug 5, 2014
This is exactly what it feels like. Beautiful poem
Phantomtigers Featured By Owner Aug 5, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
this is the opposite of horrible :huggle:
WindFragments Featured By Owner Aug 4, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Ahh I remember writing lots of things similar to this. 

Beautiful job as always :heart:
Andr0o Featured By Owner Aug 3, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
I love it. Fantastic!
zoefletcher Featured By Owner Aug 3, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Oh my god. This hit me so hard that if I were standing in front of some stairs I probably would have fallen down them.I think I've fainted.  I love love love this so much, I just want to write on my wall or something. The whole poem had me filled with some sort of tense yet calm silence, like I really was leaning against my truck at night, looking up at the stars. Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful piece that you should be proud of.
Your words are so much more beautiful than any supermodel's body Heart Heart Heart 
PaperAnomaly Featured By Owner Aug 2, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
you're still beautiful
UntamedUnwanted Featured By Owner Aug 2, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Drake-Dementia Featured By Owner Aug 1, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
One of my favorite things to do is go to the nearby hill in my town at night and just gaze up at the sky. Coming to terms with one's own significance can have profound effects on their worldview; in my case, it made me determined to be remembered. I can honestly say I did not realize your poem was about literal weight until you mentioned it in the description. I suppose you could say I'm dense, but frankly that's what writing is all about; interpretation. The fact that so many different things can be taken from a single piece shows that you have the ability to write with depth. Excellent work.
introverted-ghost Featured By Owner Aug 1, 2014   Writer
I absolutely adore sections 2 and 3. They're just beautiful. :heart:
saltwaterlungs Featured By Owner Aug 1, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Straight-forward and emotional. A lot of writers beat around the bush with their meanings to get more reactions and interpretations, but your poem is pointed and clear, making the impact even higher. It tells it how it is, no fluff.
jadeshade34 Featured By Owner Aug 1, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
I like it but it is kinda sad. But I get the lonely universe thing. my friend called me a universe before she died. she had cancer, she told me to stop being the universe and explore the world. Since I was always open minded but I was to shy, to lonely at the time. Your poem has multiple meanings and thats what I like about it
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Submitted on
August 1, 2014


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